Question: “From a teenagers perspective, why are so many Christians fake in the youth groups (and church) of today? Are you one of the fake people? If so, why? Why not just be transparent and honest and show your struggles and stop trying to pretend all the time?”– Chadnuff, 42, KS

Answer: “Is this really related only to teenagers? Is this not an epidemic across all ages in the church?
Perhaps, if teenagers witness more transparency in their parents and role models they’d be more comfortable walking in it themselves. At some point there was a shift in the church from being honest about struggles and problems to putting up an “Everythings perfect and I love Jesus” act. It’s no different with teenagers. They need to feel secure and comfortable before they will open up and share what they’re going through. If they feel that they will be condemned, they’re more likely to hide it. As bearers of the Gospel it’s our job to show that while we are sinners there is still reconciliation through the blood of Jesus Christ.” –
PaulX, 18, OH

Answer: “Well I can tell you, I’ve been going to church for 16 years now and I’m …16 years old, so I know exactly what you’re talking about. I see it all the time. No, I wouldn’t say I’m a fake Christian. I WAS, but that was in my pre-teen years, and I think it was because I didn’t know any better. And why didn’t I know any better? Well, I would say a lot of it has to do with the fake adults who go to church. Lets be honest, the generation above us has failed at being Godly examples to their children for the most part.

I had friends whose parents would serve in the church and worship so full out and cry because they were overwhelmed by the Spirit, and they would walk right out of the doors of the church and start cussing their kid out. How is that supposed to help us know how to act? As adults, you need to watch what you’re doing, even if you think no one is watching you, because you’re an example of true Christianity to the younger generation, and when you act fake, so will we. Also, I think that we act out of ignorance. It breaks my heart to see so many people talking during worship at our youth group. I’ve always wondered why they don’t understand how disrespectful that is to God. But the truth is, it’s because I (nor anyone else) has told them. They don’t know any better, because no one says anything to them. I’m not talking about people raised in the church now, I’m talking about kids who are new Christians and act out of ignorance. Its our job to be the example, and people act fake because we fail at our jobs.


As for being transparent and honest, thats a tough thing to ask of a teenager. We’re all prideful people and I think deep down we’re all ashamed of our sins so we try to hide them. I think more people would show their struggles and sins if they knew they could trust the people that they are confiding in. Those things should be confidential, not blabbed around the whole church and people are afraid of their secrets getting out. It should stay between the student and ONE leader, not the whole staff. Churches are associated with hypocrisy and judgment now, and if someone feels like they’re going to be judged in a place where they shouldn’t be, they’re never going to be transparent. and really… why should they be? –
Rachael, 16, OH

Answer: Judgment, everyone is worried about what others will think. The last thing you want as a teenager is to be shunned or outcasted for the “in crowd”. And even though we all hate to admit it there are clicks everywhere even in youth groups. In mine we are all pretty close and to come to eachother with our problems. Now I try to always be real and me whether in church or at school or where ever I am at. But a couple years ago i was the one who pretended everything was fine the world is great because I was scared of what others would think of me so i just held it in all my pain all my fears all my hate and it destroyed me. I was on antidepressants, I couldnt sleep so was on meds for that, i had anxiety attacks one of which sent me to the ER, i was broken and a mess. The main problem is people lose trust in other people , the times i tried opening up to people the next day at school people would know and theyd have something me to say just because they could.Youth group needs to be a safe place i know now mine is and once others realize they can trust you will probably see a lot less fake people.”Christina, 16, IL

Answer: “I have noticed the same thing as well! I think its because of peer-pressure, and not having a trust with the other youth. I hate to be honest, but a lot of Christian youth of this day don’t read the bible much, worship, or even spend much time in prayer. I’m not saying they can’t or won’t, but most just don’t. I also believe that “church” has become part of the calendar, its not very important to people. Some Christians want Sunday mornings and that’s all. They are satisfied, they know they are going to heaven, and they really don’t have much desire to grow deeper in the Lord. That doesn’t mean they are bad people, it just means that they are fine with where they are with God in their life.” – Worshipper24, 15, IL

What do you think?

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